Friday, December 8, 2006

Sock Monkey That!


I made my first sock monkey today. Actually, I should call it a "sweater monkey" since I made it from an old sweater. I loved this sweater until I saw a picture of myself in it and I looked like a big pink pillow, so it went into the goodwill bag, until I decided I needed to make some monkeys.

Sock Monkey Aesthetics

This sock monkey is painfully ugly. I realized this pretty early on, as I was sewing the legs. The legs are very long compared to the body. Surely no golden mean of ratios of leg versus body length has been met. I decided to press on, thinking that perhaps the beauty of the monkey would consist of her softness, of her sweet spirit and kind demeanor. I stuffed her with the ugliest silk scarves. They wouldn't be good for anything else and they don't show, so they don't count. I sewed on her ears, on the side of her head, since she is a primate, like us, and our ears, for better or worse, don't stick up like a cat's, but lay on the side of our heads. I couldn't find two matching buttons, so she has failed at symmetry (but they are vintage mother-of-pearl).

Her head is lumpy. It is a phrenologist's dream. Her stitching shows (I was lazy and used white thread. I did it on purpose! Its artsy stitching!). I sewed matching socks for her (a self-referencing accessory) that look like condoms on her legs.

The Verdict
I brought her out for the M to see. She immediately declared her a "beautiful sock monkey!" I was relieved to see a 150 years of aesthetics go down the drain. I hinted that this might be her Christmas present, and the M's face brightened. I am not sure why the M thought she was pretty-- perhaps her homeliness was somehow appealing in this context. Maybe cuddly things don't have to be classically beautiful.

John B suggested that I have a naming contest. If you have a suggestion, feel free to leave a kibbitz. The winner gets a free prize, so make sure you leave your info.


John B. said...

You could have a naming contest for her.

Camille said...

The contest is ON! The judging will be based entirely on my personal judgment. Ha Ha!

Nori said...

Niabelle Marroo?

El Caballero said...

She is clearly an Ophelia.

raybon said...

I think she's an Audrey

Anonymous said...


Camille said...

thanks for all the suggestions. I am going to write all the entries on pieces of paper and put them under my pillow tonight. That way I can give them full consideration.

hey anony, do you mean "Princess H" or is your entry "Princess" and you are "H"?

Anonymous said...


Camille said...

I am now awake, and the winner is...

Niabelle Maroo!

Congradulations Nori!

Nori said...

Yeah!!! What do I win?

Contessa said...

I must say, I like her very much. The sweater monkey, that is. Oh, and M too,
for that matter. :)
I would have suggested the name, "Olivia," which also happens to be the name I
offered for my friends' newborn baby girl yesterday. While others in the room at the time
agreed that this was a better name for the new baby than "Adria" or
"Addison," the new parents shot it down, preferring one of the "A"
names, but still unable to decide which one.

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