Tuesday, May 11, 2004

I am sitting here NAKED!


Is that allowed I wonder.

to 1) be naked in the first place
and 2) to actually admit it on-line. To the WORLD.

I mean, is it inappropriate if there is no actual visual? (Someday, my friends, someday)

AND its TUESDAY, and well, that changes everything.

Because stuff happens on Tuesday... It has to be one of the most personified days of the week. Black Tuesday, Fat Tuesday, Election Day...

I think I have found out what nirvana is. I was in bed this morning (my OWN bed, if you have to know, the one with the drawers). Reading more Tom Stoppard and the light-of-dawn was forcefully sneaking past the purple curtains and everything was blissful. It certainly wasn't a nice Christian state of blessedness, or the bosom of Abraham, or paradise. It wasn't even a carnal state of bliss. I actually don't think nirvana is the correct term either. "Happiness" seems, you know, too bougie, too founding fathers. I wasn't having any paradigm shaking epiphanies. Perhaps the OED will shed some light on this topic.

(don't look now, but I am reading the OED, naked!) (now I am learning all sorts of interesting things... The N section is nifty...) Between NIREX and nisei. Perfect bliss and release from Karma, attained by the extinction of individuality. Hmm... Nope, I am still 559-28-3456. Shit, I guess that isn't it. Hm, being a Christian, does Jesus release me from my karmic debt? That would be pretty cool. But then again, you reap what you sow. If karma is your debt, and you take away the "your" (thus, the individuality) you are just left with a floating debt. Where does it go? Back to where it came from? It seems to me, that nirvana is simply "passing" ie, dropping out of the game. Where is the fun in that? I am clearly not cut out to be a Hindu. Who is, I wonder? Whereas, Jesus cancels the debt, not the debtor. Well, there you go, that's why I am Christian and not a Hindu.

Back to my original query, maybe i was having an aesthetic experience. That doesn't answer anything. Though it gives it a nice label.

And I am still naked.

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