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This was up for 30 Seconds

Then I had regrets and deleted it. I've pasted it for you, dear readers, so you can see just how cheesy I can be when no one is looking. My goal was to write without... ellipses.

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I am here. - 30 (santa cruz)
Reply to: pers-111850093@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-11-17, 12:19AM PST


I am here. Sitting in the flickering glow of the ancient Mac. Listening to my housemates make love in the other room.

I wish I was staring into a fire right now, in a cave, with the coyotes howling at a safe distance, bundled up in furs and listening to the gopher sizzle on the spit. With that nice post-digestive feeling, when you have eaten the right amount of food, and maybe you could eat a little more, but you just don't need to.

Watching the light dance on the ceiling and composing a story in my head. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see the stars in the night sky. They disappear momentarily as an owl swoops by. The moonlight limns the ground outside in steel gray. The air is cold, but I am warm. I shut my eyes, but I can see the glow of the fire through my eyelids. My brain is bathed in an orange light. I let myself get lost in it.

The fire dies but the embers continue to glow like windows in a tiny city-- the little corpuscles of fire flitting around like harried commuters on their way home. I am glad that I am home. Sleep will soon come steeling in on muffled feet.

Where are you in this picture? Were you the one who killed the gopher or kindled the fire? Is there a you? Or am I really just sitting here alone, staring at my Mac?

I am a woman. Here is a picture of my feet.