This is from El Cab's Uncle Albert. It makes about a gallon of salsa and it is hot, so beware.
Finely chop the following and combine in a large ceramic bowl (metal or plastic might react or melt).
the corrected version-- basically the more peppers you add, the more onions you need (the milder version). All quantities are approximate.
5 or 6 large tomatoes
2 large white onions (1)
2 large red onions (1)
2 large yellow onions (1)
1 bunch cilantro
5 jalapeno peppers (3 or 4)
3 serrano peppers (2)
1 habanero pepper, chopped super-super fine
3 fat cloves of garlic, grated or chopped super-fine
juice of three lemons or limes
quantities of salt and pepper
Wear disposable latex gloves to chop the peppers and use a separate cutting board that you can put in the dishwasher. The acids are powerful. You think you have washed your hands, and then oops, you rub your eyes and all of a sudden your world is consumed with an unquenchable fire. You gnash your teeth, you think you are in hell, you wish you were dead. It is all preventable with just a few precautions. Use the whole pepper, seeds and all, except the stem.
As you are chopping things up and adding them to the bowl, stop every ten minutes to sprinkle the mixture with lemon juice and salt. This prevents the ingredients from oxidizing, and something alchemical happens, you can actually smell it shifting from a collection of various vegetables, to a strong, intense note, an odor that is more than the sum of its parts, the smell of perfect salsa magic. If you skip this process, I take no responsibility for the pathetic mess you'll make.
According to El Cab, this salsa will stimulate your circulation and cleanse your liver. Be sure to eat it all within 48 hours, as the salsa is volatile and does not age gracefully.
How to Pronounce "Salsa"
Both ss are soft. No "z" sounds.
The N*ster's Salsa For Normal People
2 large tomatoes
1 white onion
1 lemon or lime
1 or 2 jalepenos
4 tablespoons fresh cilantro
salt and pepper
Finely chop it all up and combine in a bowl.
The N*ster is an amazing cook. She was the first person to teach me how to make salsa. She also showed me how to make fried chicken and many many other delectables, on both sides of the globe.